Love Defined

Hey folks. BHC here. I got asked a great question by a Nation member the other day. Whilst I was in the middle of a flirting session that would have made George Clooney proud, the object of my affection stumped me. And folks, believe me when I say that there are very few times when Yours Truly is at a loss for words. She asked me, what at first I thought was a very simple question, “How do you define love?”. Then it dawned on me that it was a bigger question than I had first given credit.BHCLove. It’s not a scary word, though it is 4 letters. And really, aren’t the 4 letter words the best ones? Love, lust, life, boob, cash, all great 4 letter words. Only one of them is so frightening that men will spend years pleading for it while never wanting to say it. I have no problem with love. It’s something I give so freely that many times I have found that when I mean it on a more personal level I am sometimes not believed. That’s probably happened to all of us at one point or another. You mean the word and the person you said it to doesn’t feel the same or simply doesn’t know how to react to it. A feeling about as pleasant as taking a golf shoe to the face. But when the person you love feels the same way about you, well that’s when you find out that love, though powerful and awesome, is not enough to make a relationship work. So how come we put so much stock in love?

When the last lady I was serious about told me that if I didn’t want to continue to be disappointed I should stop asking her to do things with me, I was crushed like a bug under a bull dozer. I love her, she loved me. That should have been enough, right? I should have heard the Elton John song swell to a crescendo as we ran into each others arms for a kiss that made the rest of the world disappear. Ever had a kiss like that? It’s magic that Harry Potter only wishes he could pull off. But love wasn’t enough. I thought it was. I still do. I think John Lennon was so right on the money, “All you need is love.” I think that when I look into a women’s eyes and see the reflection of my soul there is nothing that can tear us apart. Sadly, thinking something, no matter how great a thought, doesn’t make it true. There’s a million things that can tear two loving people asunder. And if both people don’t respect the rareness of two people who can see into each others hearts, then it’s doomed. But even in doom, I still love.

So, how do I define something that has filled my heart with both joy and pain? Love is the feeling of yourself in another. Love is the miracle that proves the soul exists. Love is not something to be taken lightly, but should be given generously. Love is wanting to come home just to look at that special someone in their comfy clothes. Love is permanent, yet disappears without tending. Love is laughter, tears, whispers, and screams. Love is elusive, yet all around. Love is blind, but looks through you. But if I had to choose one simple definition for something I think is so complicated I would say this: Love is all you need.

Thanks John. Well said.

Love you all,
  1. #1 by Jules on December 6, 2010 - 6:44 pm

    WELL SAID…Although I’ve had many loves… I’ve finally met my match… and believe – you, me…. it’s worth the wait, effort and the many Mr Wrongs. Keep bobbing… it bites you in your tail when you least expect it… and if it’s any consolation… I lubber you!

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